The Sweet Frangrance Story

Have you ever walked down a lane or in a garden when plumeria’s are blooming? The sun warms the flowers, and the fragrance fills the air. Even if you can’t see the tree or flowers, the makani (wind) fills the air with a sweetness that’s hard to describe but lasts in your memory forever.

Sometimes, the simplest act of kindness can have an impact and “sweeten the air” for someone far beyond what you could imagine.

When I was 8 years old, in the midst of deep fear, a nurse showed me kindness that impacted me so deeply, I can still see her face. I doubt she had any idea how much her actions would still touch me over 50 years later.

- the rest of the story -

When I was born, it was quickly noticeable to my parents that my eyes had a problem. I have strabismus which means my eyes work independently. I’ve had 6 corrective surgeries, the first one by age one. At that time, this procedure was brand new. In fact, I had one of the pioneer surgeons for 3 of my surgeries at Stanford University. I’ve been told that, without these surgeries, I would look cross-eyed and be blind in one eye.

I clearly remember three of my childhood surgeries. It was an uncomfortable recovery, but the hospital stay was especially scary as parents weren’t allowed to stay with their children overnight back in those days.

I always had to check in the day before the surgery. As my mom said goodby and left, a deep dread came over me. Nighttime was the worst. All the other children on the ward were asleep, but I laid wide awake. My nurse kept checking on me, trying to reassure me but I couldn’t sleep. Then, she did something surprising I have never forgotten.

She had me get out of bed, and walked me down to the nurses station. I was afraid she was going to give me a shot. Instead, she showed me around, and then she pulled up a chair, raised it so I could reach the desk, gave me a big pad of paper AND one of those pens you could click to change colors - black, blue, green, and red. She said I could sit with her as she worked and draw for as long as I wanted to.

It was a simple act. But it had a huge impact. I felt secure, cared about, relieved, and “grown up” sitting with the nurses. I will never forget her kindness, or her face.

Sometimes, we are so in need of love ourselves, we can’t even think of showing love to others (if this is the case for you I hope you’ll check out the story “You are Loved” with the artwork "Hawaiian Heart" on the artliftinghearts website).

But most of the time, stopping to feel empathy and coming up with a kind action can often feel like an inconvenience. We may think it’s too costly, or we question whether the thing we might do is really very important. Often we think about it so long, the opportunity is gone.

Like the fragrance of the plumeria, acts of kindness have a way of impacting a person’s life far beyond the initial action. Having empathy for the pain or struggles of others, and offering kindness - even if it’s small and quick and we never see that person again, can have an impact bigger than we can even imagine.

I was recently traveling home from a trip to see my grandkids. I had made a mistake in my booking and when I checked in, I was told they could not get my bag home with me. After a lot of going back and forth about options, I think the two employees saw the panic in my eyes. They jumped into action to solve the problem, waiving my change fees, changing my reservations and they got me home, with my bag, on a different itinerary, but arriving at the same time I was expecting to get home!!

While they were working on all of this I was holding my breath. When they came to me with the solution and frantically worked on tagging the bag and printing new tickets, I wished I could hug them both. Then I remembered the appreciation cards I was carrying. I picked out two and as they gave me my tickets and told me to RUN to the gate… I handed the cards to them and thanked them again. As I ran… I prayed, “God, let them know how deeply appreciative I am of all their hard work for me.”

Of course, I will never know if, and how those cards impacted either of them. The nurse at the hospital will never know how she impacted me. But like the plumeria, that spreads its fragrance far beyond where you can see it, we too can spread love and kindness far beyond where we can see its impact.

Where can you show an extra bit of kindness, or a have an extra bit of empathy today? May you be a “Sweet Fragrance” to all of those around you.